Dear Toru Naruse,
I don’t know whether you’d like to read my letter or not. If you’re surprised finding I’m writing to you, well to be honest, I am surprised too. I don’t know where I got the idea of writing to you. It’s just.... well, I know, some words are better left unsaid. But for me, I prefer to know how you’ll react when you read this (I’m still wondering if you read my letter) than I never know how you feel about me. It’s starting killing me just to see you around or saying “hi” to you like there’s nothing happened. My heart skipped a beat everytime I saw you.
Listen, I would like to tell you that the first time I saw you, I know there’s something different in you. I fell into ummmm.. admiring you?
Yeah. I was admiring you for the first time. I am admiring you now. And I will be admiring you tomorrow, the day after tomorrow, next week, next month. Forever. I will admire you forever.
And today, I saw you’re sitting all alone there. Holding your basket ball. You made a face. It’s like you’re thinking hard on it. Out of my control, I was walking toward. Sitting right beside you. Though my heart was pumping harder, I didn’t care. When I was sitting beside you, I just want you to know that you’re not alone. That’s all.
But then, you told me everything. What you thought as your weaknesses. About your self confidence problems. You also told me that you will fight the barriers. You will fight to be a winner. Yes, you told me everything. Everything. I repeat it: You. Told. Me. Everything. Today.
I just couldn’t believe it. You? The famous Toru Naruse? Told me everything to me? Who am I to you?
Well, to be honest, deep down inside my heart, I felt warm. Happy, as you can tell. Is it really me, whom you trusted? Were you seeing me as me? Do you like me like I do like you?
I’m so sorry for not having my self confidence because you told me everything. I felt like dreaming. Because it seems impossible to reach you out.
I know, what I feel to you is gonna be stronger. I know I have no control on it. I will just let it flow. I won’t ask you to do the same, if you don’t want it. I will keep it for myself. Anyhoo, thank you for telling me everything, today. You’re such my inspirations. You’re keeping me to stay in positive. You made me fight for all the troubles that come to me. I will keep the look in your eyes, forever. That will always be my spirit to face my bright future. Thank you. I love you. And also, I miss you.
Toru, I was thinking about this:
“I don’t believe in coincidence. All I know is everything happens for a reason. Like why you and I are destined to meet.”
- your admirer -
I wrote it for my "boyfriend" Toru Naruse, from Harlem Beat.
This entry is posted for event "Surat Cinta Untukmu" hosted by Ren.